I’m glad that this was posted on craigslist. Otherwise I might have gone through my entire life thinking that re-enacting the knife fight scene from the “Beat It” video by Michael Jackson with another guy while jerking off was “kinda gay”.

Guest post from craigslist, for the ladies. Enjoy–and pay attention!

I think that most guys are easy to please when it comes to sucking their cock. Sure, you might find yourself the occasional connoisseur, but generally if you go for quantity over quality you can’t go wrong. But, if you want to blow his mind when you blow his cock, here’s some tips. I’ve got most of my information from asking other people, both guys and girls, and I’ve included stuff I’ve learned in my experience as a cock-sucking slut!

First of all, the general opinion seems to be that unless there’s a pressing reason (like you’re sucking off total strangers on a crowded train) it’s preferable if you’re naked. Particularly if you’ve got nice tits (and let’s face it, boys are less fussy about the tits they can get in their bedroom than they are about the ones in porn), topless is almost a minimum requirement. There are a couple of advantages to being naked when you’re giving a blowjob. Firstly, it’s easier to clean up — just rub anything that lands on you into your skin. Sure, you’ll never get a nice Monica Lewinski-style souvenir, but at the same time you’ll save money on dry cleaning. Secondly, it means easy access so you or he can play with your bits and pieces — you’ll both love it, more on this later.

Now, obviously getting naked before giving head will decrease the spontaneity a bit. Spontaneity is something a lot of guys like, and I think there are a few reasons. Firstly, the idea that you can’t wait to drink the cum straight out of him will probably drive your man wild. I remember watching in awe as my best friend dropped to her knees at a music festival once, her man loved it so much she only just got her mouth around his dick in time to swallow his load. I think a spontaneous blowjob also has a subtle psychological effect. If you randomly whip out his cock and suck him off, it will seem more likely to him that you’ll do it again some time.

So to put a bit of that spontaneity back in, you could try a couple of things that work for me. Obviously, you could take advantage of already being naked, if you’re changing clothes or having a shower. Another thing I’ve found drives most men wild is to drop to your knees, start sucking on their cock, and then tear your clothes off. Finally, you could do a little bit of planning and be wearing something that will come off quickly and easily as you move toward his big, throbbing member. You could, of course, suck him off fully clothed every once in a while, some guys love it like that, some like to have a view.

A very important facet of your blowjob is what I will, for want of a better word, call presentation. I’ve found that there’s not much turns a man on more than the idea that you can’t resist sucking on his dick. Paradoxically, a bit of teasing is also a big help, particularly if you’re trying to make and impression. The old sucking on a prop trick is clich�d because it works — don’t be scared to use it. If there’s nothing suitable readily available, suck on your finger. This is extremely effective if you do it in public. Just keep your eyes locked on his, so he knows the prop is standing in for his dick, not someone else’s.

In a similar vein, give him a big sloppy kiss and pretend his tongue is his dick. Suck it into your mouth and run your tongue over it. Some guys like this more than others.

Once you get him alone with plenty of time, give him a show. You or he can take your clothes off, but if you want him to do it you might need to get it started to give him the idea — men can be a bit slow sometimes! If you’re a confident girl, give him a bit of a striptease, with or without music, finish up with a few sexy poses, then get out his dick and chow down. If you’re a bit less outgoing, or you’re shy, take your own clothes off, but do it slowly. One thing that used to help me was imagining your hands belong to someone else. Move a slowly as you can, turning occasionally. Caress your own skin like a lover should. A big teasing tip: remove your underwear with your back to him, but turn between bra and panties so he gets a look at your tits. Pinch your nipples a bit for him, I’ve never met a man that didn’t work on. If you’re insecure about your body, do all this with the lights low; guys have a pretty good imagination, so chances are he’ll remember you looking sexier than you think.

So now we’re at the stage where you’re naked and he’s starting to go crazy with lust. You need to get over there and start sucking, and you can just do that directly if you want. This works well in terms of making him feel irresistible. I would recommend saying something like, “Get that big dick out, honey, I want to suck you dry,” as you advance on him. Try to time it so your knees hit the floor as his cock pops out of his pants, that way it’s more like a porn movie, and he’ll love it.

To keep things in your control, you need to keep him mesmerised, so I’d recommend slow and sexy movements. If he’s standing I like to walk over to him, swaying my hips, and grab his belt. Pull him up against you, press your tits into his chest, and kiss him as you undo his pants. Get down on your knees as you push his undies down; kiss down his body if you want, I would recommend looking into his eyes.

If he’s sitting I like to crawl over to him. If he’s on a chair I crawl all the way, but if he’s on a bed I’ll walk to the bed then crawl up to him. As you crawl, arch your back downward like a cat stretching. Try brushing your nipples on the floor. This leaves your ass sticking up in the air, and the crawling motion will make it sway enticingly. When you reach him, stop at his dick, give him a lustful look and start getting into his pants.

This is the point at which you either whip him out and get going, or you turn the teasing up to eleven. I have driven guys wild by starting to blow them through their underwear (this works better with stretchy skin-tight undies than with loose silk boxers). Try giving him the impression that as much as you’re teasing him, the self-denial is twice as bad for you. A girlfriend of mine likes to savour the smell as if it’s a cigar. Do whatever you feel like, the important thing is you’re teasing him to make it better, not to make his life miserable!

How you proceed once you’re face-to-face with his cock depends on what condition it’s in. Young guys will be just about ready to cum, while old guys won’t be hard yet (generally — prepare to be surprised, it’s part of the fun!). One thing I absolutely love is putting a flaccid dick in my mouth and feeling it swell up in there. I’ll also pop the young guys straight in so that if they’re going to lose it we can get the first one out of the way and start again. Otherwise I generally give the cock a bit of a tongue bath.

I’d like to talk a bit about taste. Personally, I think cock tastes good. It doesn’t have to be straight out of the shower, I don’t mind if it’s developed a bit of an aroma, within reason. If you pull it out of his pants and the smell beats you over the head take him off to the shower, give him a rinse, and continue there. Trust me, most guys will do anything for head, so he won’t mind. Just try not to grimace or retch. You might find a man who wants you to lick things off him. Whipped cream and stuff is fine (although wash well to avoid smelling of cheese), no problems. Lots of guys like you to lick your pussy juices off them (assuming you’re not using a condom, which means only in a trusting relationship once you’ve been tested — very important), which is something I have no problem with. I would advise you to taste yourself on your own if you think you might do this — just lick your fingers when you masturbate, and that way you won’t surprise yourself. Some guys want to do the ass-to-mouth thing they’ve seen in porn. Leave this one in the videos, it’s not worth the risk associated with ingesting your own shit. Finally, personally I hate the taste of latex, but I know some of my girlfriends don’t mind it. I always use flavoured condoms for casual sex so he’ll at least taste of chocolatey latex.

So, we’re up to licking his dick all over. Try to savour the experience, it’ll turn him on even more if you’re loving what you’re doing. One important thing about cocks is that you can push them up (against his stomach), but it could hurt him if you push it down too hard (some guys love this, though). Most guys like it if you push their cock up against their stomach and lick the underside of it. You can move down and lick their balls (gently!), and I go a bit lower to lick the perineum. This is where if you are into it, and don’t mind the risk, you can give your man’s ass a bit of a licking.

Usually at this point you’ve got one hand lifting his cock by the tip, and the other’s not really doing much, which leads us to the question of what to do with your hands. If you’re lucky enough to have a big man, your hands will be very useful because they will be the only way to stimulate the base of his dick. Wrap your hand around his shaft and pump the bit you can’t fit into your mouth. You can do the same thing if you want to concentrate on his head with your lips and tongue.

If you’re at a loss, you could always play with yourself. I’ve sucked a lot of guys who loved to look down and see me sucking hard on their cock while I tweaked and pulled both my nipples. If you’re planning to blow this guy again, be sure to show him the wet spot you leave behind because you got so turned on sucking on his big, beautiful, hard cock.

By now you should have a big, hard cock in your mouth (you lucky thing!) and your man’s full attention. As far as I can tell, the consensus seems to be that sloppy is better. Make sure you’re not dehydrated before you start so you can generate spit — you want to leave a shiny layer all over him. He’ll love the idea that you drool at the thought of sucking him off, and I’m told it feels better. This is also an area where fingering yourself gives you an advantage — just use your own juices to lube him up, supplementing his precum and your saliva. You might have seen in porn (or maybe real life, who knows?!) girls spitting at cocks. This is something I personally find a bit weird, but if a guy asked for it I’d do it. What I find sexier is nestling him between my boobs and sort of dribbling on him. Anything that misses I just wipe from my tits onto his cock.

Speaking of this kind of thing, I’ve been with guys who’ve asked for a titfuck, and I’m usually happy to oblige. I think with this kind of thing the turn-on is more visual than anything else, so be sure to look up at him with your sexy eyes and make a real show of sliding your boobs over his hard-on. Rather than waste saliva on this (it’s hard to make enough) I recommend you get some lube. If it doesn’t make you feel silly, a bit of dirty talking wouldn’t go astray. One thing I do like is rubbing the cock over my nipples. In fact I love to tell a man how wonderful his cock is as I rub it over my skin — face, tits, nipples, through my hair. I think it’s because it feels a bit naughty.

On the subject of talking, I have this to say: if you can talk to the guy, it’s not a blowjob. Your mouth should be full most of the time. Don’t get me wrong, handjobs are great, especially at the end. I love to watch a dick twitch and pump a big load of cum at me, watch it fly towards me, and feel it splatter on my skin. If you’re giving head, however, there needs to be lots of contact between your mouth and his dick. If you want to talk to him, do it between deep sucks of his cock. For example, ask him how it feels, then bury him in your mouth while he groans his ecstatic response, then pop him out again and tell him you love it too. Also, give him the impression talking is secondary to sucking by not answering him immediately. If he asks you a yes/no question, don’t even take him out of your mouth, just answer with an “Uh-huh” with your mouth full.

In terms of incoherent noises, I would advise you not to fake sexual pleasure — most guys won’t buy it if you fake an orgasm while blowing them. If you do want to make some sort of moan, think more of eating a delicious chocolate dessert rather than being skilfully fingered. Of course, if you’re going to cum for real, just let it out, and if you are playing with yourself (or he’s playing with you), respond to that too. The noises he really wants to hear are the ones that show how hard you’re working — the sucking, slurping, popping noise of a girl trying as hard as she can to drink her man’s cum!

If you talk to him, don’t be too clever — remember most of his blood’s not in his brain anymore! When I first see his cock I like to complement it — tell him it’s big, hot, hard, beautiful, whatever’s not too blatant a lie. If you really can’t complement its appearance, give it a good licking or sucking and then tell him it’s delicious. In fact, tell him that regardless. During the course of the blowjob you can reinforce the message by repeating it. You could also tell him how much you love what you’re doing, or how turned on you are (don’t lie about this — he might check). If this is just stage one of the lovemaking, tell him what you look forward to doing next. If he’s a stranger you’ve picked up, you could tell him you never do this but you find him irresistible. At the end, it’s usually a good idea to give the guy permission and encouragement. It’s nice to let him know you want to swallow, or take it on your face, or whatever. If there’s something you don’t want, tell him you do want something else, so instead of, “Don’t you dare cum in my mouth, you perve,” go for, “I want it all over my tits, you big stud.” If you don’t want the cum on you, tell him you want to watch it shoot, then point his dick past you.

As far as technique goes, I think it comes pretty naturally. You’re mimicking intercourse using your mouth, essentially. The difference is teeth, tongue, and the “fact” that good girls don’t do it. Lots of guys are freaked out by teeth in blowjobs, some guys like it. You could ask, but I prefer to let him ask me for it. Generally, just use your teeth either to scrape gently over the shaft, or to kind of grip the head at the back and pull, once again, gently! The tongue is a whole other matter. You need to use it. I don’t have a tongue piercing because I like my teeth and don’t want them chipped or ground down, but apparently this really does make a difference. Your tongue should slither around him, wrapping itself around the head, sliding along the shaft. Your technique will vary depending on the length of your tongue. A favourite among guys seems to be sticking your tongue out to lick his balls while his dick is buried in your mouth, but unless he’s miniscule you’ll need to control your gag reflex.

Now, guys love going down your throat, which is something I blame on porn. I personally have a gag reflex, so I can’t do the relentless throat-fucking thing you see in movies, and I don’t think there’s anything sexy about puking. If you are with someone who wants to make you throw up, make sure you get most of it on him. This deep-throat thing is ok as long as you’re in control, though. Once again, probably because it feels naughty, it can be a real turn-on to go as far down a cock as you can. I think guys actually prefer it if you gag a little bit, pop up for air, then dive straight back onto them, rather than either the professional “I can do this all night” thing or if you go too hard and spend minutes coughing. If a guy grabs your head and you’re not one of those girls who likes that, or if you don’t trust this particular guy, take his hands and move them down to your nipples. Then suck him as deep and as hard as you can to show there’s no hard feelings.

If you’re still at a loss as far as technique goes, get some porn and try anything you see that you like. What’s even more fun is to get some porn, then watch it with your man and give him what he sees on screen (maybe a good idea to check the movie on your own first to avoid nasty surprises!). Guys love it if you can give them exactly the same rhythm and action as the slut on screen.

After doing your thing for a while, he’ll be getting ready to unload for you. If you’re a bit inexperienced and can’t tell, he’ll start to do something different — lots of guys start to thrust at you, which means they want you to use their rhythm rather than yours so go with that; some guys go still, so basically don’t let that freak you out; some guys start talking more, or get less coherent and more grunty. If he starts saying, “I’m gonna cum, I’m gonna cum,” over and over, he’s probably a little way off and needs some help, which you can provide by popping him out of your mouth and begging for a big load!

You’ll learn to read the signs pretty easily — when he cums, his pelvic muscles all squeeze up to shoot the semen out of him and this means his balls will lift up and his shaft will twitch. Then you’ll find yourself with a jet of spunk to deal with, and you should think about how you’re going to do that well before it happens.

Personally, I think cum tastes fantastic — I’d buy it in bottles if I could — so obviously I have no problem swallowing it. If you do, I suggest two things. First of all, catch it on your skin, then rub it in — it’s sexy without you needing to taste it. Secondly, try to acquire a taste for it, because there are some fun places you can blow a man where you don’t want to leave a mess (your car, for example).

Some guys want to cum on you (usually face or tits after a blowjob), which might be their way of marking you or something. Whatever it is, there’s not much reason not to let them if you’re in private. If you’re in public (or about to be), maybe consider just how bad the consequences could be, although chances are people won’t really notice much. One of the sexiest things I’ve ever done was to blow a random guy first thing in the morning at university, have him wipe his dick in my hair, and then walk around all day being able to smell the faint aroma of cock in my hair. None of my girlfriends commented, so I assume they didn’t notice, but I was so turned on I had to go and buy some more panties at lunchtime.

To give a man the best of both worlds, do one of these, then the other. Either have him cum on you, then scoop it up and eat it, or collect his cum in your mouth and dribble it all over yourself. I have a friend who likes to “accidentally on purpose” get a few dribbles on her clothes to make herself look and feel more slutty.

Once you finish, don’t forget to thank him — he’ll thank you, but won’t expect thanks back. If he’s a regular of yours tell him you have so much fun you need to do it more often. If he’s more of a one-off thing tell him you’d love to do it again.

I hope all this helps. Please remember to be safe, and that nobody has the right to force you to do something you don’t want to do.

Hi CasualSexers,

I’m posting this before I head out to — of all places — Lincoln, Nebraska. I have never been to Nebraska before, but when I was pondering a good stop in between Phoenix and Chicago and old high school friend came to mind who is in grad school at the University of Nebraska. He assured me that Cornhusker chicks are as hot as they come, and that the action after a home game on Saturdays is intense. Going to see a big college football game (something I have yet to do) sounded like fun — as did Midwestern corn-fed girls. So I’ve booked a room at the Lincoln Marriott (a far cry from my suites at the Mondrian and Phoenician, but i’ll survive) and am heading out to the flatlands of the Midwest.

Although I’m an old 28, I’m still confident I can run with the college crowd — certainly of the female persuasion at least. Nebraska seems like a perfect place to indulge my true preference — nice, innocent girls who will suck my dick on our first encounter. I have yet to strike out on any of my stops, hopefully after Lincoln my record will be 4-0 after already conquering L.A., Vegas and Phoenix. Well, everyone wish me look. As always, I’ll post the lascivious details once they emerge.

Go Cornhuskers!

Justin

There is just something intrinsically sexy about hotel rooms, and more specifically about hotel robes. My last post on here described my meeting Rebecca at Axis Radius in Scottsdale. I could tell from the start that she really didn’t belong within that meat market environment, and it turns out she was attending some HR conference in Scottsdale with her company and was dragged there by coworkers after a company dinner. She is 26 and from Atlanta (a city now definitely on my list, she may end up being a double dipper), and is really a nice girl. You might begin to see that as a theme with me — having casual sex with sluts is almost boring and redundant to me — but sluts and hookers do occasionally have their place. However, the real conquest and excitement — for me at least — are random and brief sexual encounters with nice and classy girls who otherwise wouldn’t engage in such activities.

Rebecca definitely falls into this category which made her all the more alluring. I sense partly that she just wanted to get out of the club, but my ego will insist that she also really desired to be with me. So I got her back to my suite at the Phoenician, and after a few drinks I could tell she was mine. She was a bit shocked, but complied when I led her to the amazing jacuzzi tub in the master bath, and we undressed and languished in it for quite a while. After rinsing off in the shower, we put on the plush hotel robes — and that is the image of her that sticks in my mind. Her robe, slightly open showing her milky skin and brief glimpses of the soft tufts of bright red pubic hair. We then went out on the balcony and in the cool Phoenix air she bent over holding the railing as I pulled up her robe and did her from behind while admiring the desert landscape under a full moon. I must say, out of the almost 10 conquests since my “tour” began, she is in a strong first place. Maybe it was the robe, but I think it was much more. I better get ahold of myself lest my misogynistic pussy tour turn into some kind of sensitive love-fest. Nah, that’s not gonna happen.

Justin

God, I love Scottsdale — more specifically, I love the Phoenician. If anyone from the Phoenician staff should run across these posts, I apologize for discussing your fine property within such a prurient context — and I also apologize to subsequent guests in my suite for a few stains. However, they’ll probably never see them, so ignorance is bliss. So I got into Phoenix this morning and met up with my buddy and we played 18 here at the Phoenician. Shot a 94, and was quite proud of myself considering how difficult this course was — but enough about golf. After a great steak at Mastro’s, we headed over to the VIP room at Axis Radius. Let me tell you, that place rocks. And, as with most places in America, if you’re a decent looking guy with a few bucks, then scoring there is akin to shooting proverbial fish in the barrel.

So just a few minutes after sitting down at our table at Axis Radius, I make eye contact with a really cute blond. I was about to approach her, but a bright color within my peripheral vision caught my attention. It was stunning red hair sitting on top of a beautiful girl with milky Victorian skin. Unlike the majority of the other chicks in the place, she wasn’t dressed slutty whatsoever. Actually, very restrained, and for some reason she didn’t look like she belonged here. Ordinarily, I don’t go for redheads — but something about her really did it for me. It was a tall task to stand out among all the other hot chicks at this club — and she really wasn’t trying which added to my attraction. Well, to make a long story short, I stayed at Axis Radius for all of 45 minutes — and am now back here at my suite at the Phoenician with sweet redhead Rebecca. I must go now and join her out on the balcony, but I promise to post all the lascivious details soon.

Justin

Hi Casual Encounters Fans,

Justin here. So I’ve taken care of some personal and money shit (seems once you have money then problems inevitably come along with it) and am ready to depart San Fran and get back on my sex trail. L.A. and Vegas are behind me, and they served as excellent locales to kick off my “tour”. So I’ve been pondering my next stops, and I’m going to meet up with a buddy in Phoenix to play a bit of golf (and chase a bit of pussy). After that I’m not sure. I want to start heading towards Chicago for an Italian beef sandwich (I love those things) and some fine midwest-raised chicks (I love those too). However, I probably should make a stop or two in between, but I must admit that the majority of the US Midwest is a mystery to me. I’ve been to Chicago several times and love it there, but I have little travel experience outside of catching connecting flights in the rest of the Midwest.

I’ve heard Colorado Springs is really cool and was thinking about stopping there. I’ve also been told that any large Midwestern university is prime pickings on game Saturdays. So, i’m gonna research a bit further. First stop is definitely Scottsdale, and I’m going to stay at the Phoenician (yes, money is nice — before it would have been Motel 6). Hopefully my drives will be long and i’ll find some nice AZ girls who will help me add strokes to a game of a different sort. Any nice girls in the Phoenix area over the next few days who desire to have casual sex with me and never hear from me again — please let me know. OK, maybe you can have two nights if you’re truly special. And I promise i’ll give you a fake name if I write about you on here after our encounter.

I’ll update everyone from Scottsdale,

Justin

Hey everyone — Justin here again reporting back in. Just got into Vegas after a few days in LA. Just like LA, Vegas is a whole lot different when you have a few bucks in your pocket. I was never a big gambler, but I figured I’d give a craps table here at the Palms a shot before I asked for a comp’d room. I was by a buddy of mine who knows about these things to gamble a bit before requesting a room and I’d have a better chance of scoring a rockin’ suite. So I walked up to the table with $2500 — and after just a few exceedingly lucky runs I was up $6500. I decided this was my queue to walk away when I was ahead and focus on my core mission — chasing pussy. First chore was to hopefully score a cool suite, and I headed off to find a casino host to hook me up. I had only taken a few steps when a cute brunette approached me asking me how I was doing.

Now I’m an OK looking guy, and this is Vegas and all — but this seemed just too easy. My suspicions were proven correct when she indicated that she’d make my afternoon really fun for the bargain price of just $1500. Now, I’m not above paying for it — sluts, whores… what’s the difference? Besides, you are actually paying for her to leave quickly afterwards as opposed to for the act itself. That being said, $1500 was quite a hefty sum for only a few hours — even though I viewed it as part of the Palm’s money I just took from them on the craps table. I employed my best negotiating skills, and soon we reached agreement at $900. I asked her to come with me while I got a comp’d suite from a casino host, and she looked at me a bit funny.

I soon realized why when it became apparent the (female) casino host knew full well exactly what my companion was. However, she only gave me one disapproving look while she efficiently hooked me up with a nice suite for the night. My paid conquest we’ll call Jessica (that is actually the name she gave me, but surely fake so i’ll feel free to use it on here) was 21 and from Phoenix. She insisted that she wasn’t a hooker per se — just a girl who comes to Vegas with some friends in search of some easy extra spending money. The official term I was told is “weekend warrior”. Whatever her title, I was eager to fuck her — and it was actually quite nice. Better than either of my first two chicks in LA. Afterwards, I talked her into letting me snap a pic as she finished showering — so long as I didn’t show her face. I told her my fans insisted. Gonna be here for 3 days — surely many more conquests to come during this leg of my trip.

Justin

Hey, Justin here again. Arrived yesterday at my first Justin World Pussy Tour stop of Los Angeles, and trust me — this city is much better once you have money. Staying at the Mondrian and hanging with my buddies Larry and Phil who are more than happy to pick up my leftovers — just kidding guys. Last night we were at Sky Bar, and I don’t think I have ever seen a larger selection of hot chicks in one place. I am falling easily into my new role as young wealthy entreprenuer (even though i’m still fucking clueless as to how I actually made my own money), and girls eat it up. We started out chatting up a nice group of MAW’s (Model/Actress/Whatever), and I became fixated on a hot brunette we’ll call Amy (I won’t be using real names of girls on here — that would be uncouth). Amy was among the legions of aspiring Snooki’s, but she had a bit higher of an IQ. After regaling her with stories of my investing prowess (ha ha), she was more than eager to accompany me down to my suite.

Amy had the honor (or dishonor as the case may be) to be my first conquest within the Pussy Tour — and she performed consummate to this coveted designation as the first fuck on my adventure. She was 22, brunette and built for speed. I’m not positive, but I actually think her tits were real — which is quite a novelty around these parts. In reality, I was quite affectionate with her and felt bad when it came time to blow her off — but it had to be done. I made up some shit about one of my friends back at Sky Bar being about to be deployed to Afghanistan, and I dutifully entered her number into my phone (quickly deleted thereafter). It was only midnight — plenty of time left during night #1 for a second target. I didn’t want to go back up to Sky Bar for fear of running back into Amy, so I texted Phil (Larry had already departed with some skank back to his place in Huntington Beach) and we went off in search of new pastures.

After pulling out of the Mondrian in my rented Ferrari 360 (shout out to the guys at RentInStyle.com), we pulled up at the first red light next to two babes who were immediately attracted to our perceived wealth (in reality Phil doesn’t have a proverbial pot to piss in). Having already had a brunette that evening, I selected the blonde of the two (who was Phil to argue), and I graciously got Phil his own room so he didn’t have to take his chick back to his crappy apartment. We’ll call conquest #2 Cindy — and she is now curled up naked under the 400 count Egyptian cotton sheets in my bed as I sit and have my morning coffee writing this post. I figure I’ll be a nice guy and let her blow me one more time before she gets blown off.

Stay tuned for further adventures — next stop is, of course, Vegas!

Justin

Hey everyone,

My name is Justin, and I’ve agreed to take over posting here at Casual Encounters. Let me start by sharing a bit of my story. I’m 27 and grew up here in the San Francisco (East Bay) area. I did so-so in high school and ended up dropping out of college during my sophomore year (a bit too drinking and carousing). I got a job as a server at a national family dining restaurant chain (surely you’ve eaten at one, but I won’t disclose which) and worked hard resulting in a promotion to manager last year. This area is quite expensive, and my $50,000 a year earnings hardly allowed me to live in the lap of luxury. However, I was getting by and was able to set aside just over $12,000 in savings — which was quite a difficult task. I’m ordinarily not very good with money — all i know how to do is spend it — so I just let my money sit in a savings account earning almost nothing in the form of interest.

Around 6 months ago, one of my best buddies from college (the little time I was there) approached me about a company he wanted to start. He was always a major software geek, and candidly, I still don’t understand anything about what he does. However, I did trust him and had confidence in his ability — so I said what the fuck and invested $10,000 with him figuring I wasn’t earning anything on it sitting in my savings account. To make a long story short, my buddy landed a major client and suddenly all sorts of large investors were interested in his company. I was shocked when one of these investors offered me over two million dollars for my shares, and even though my buddy told me I was getting screwed at that price — I jumped on it. Yes, I’m still pinching myself.

This was several weeks ago, and my first thought was to invest it for retirement and continue working hard at my job. That thought quickly evaporated, and after only two days of work after coming into this money I said fuck it and quit. I’ve decided to take a year off and do what I do best — party and chase pussy. You’re only young once, right? So I’ve agreed to share my exploits on Casual Encounters in order to create a record of my travels for posterity. Women of the world — look out — Justin is coming.

Catch everyone again soon,

Justin

Sometimes an old fashioned score needs to be settled between friends. That is all that is going on here and the beauty of the request lies in its simplicity: friends can’t see friends’ penises, friends’ girlfriends can’t see friends’ penises, so there is a problem in need of a solution.

Seems easy enough, but there are some issues raised that need to be explored. First of all, there is the problem that the measurements are to be done individually and that is understandable as it would be, like, totally gay to whip out the cocks in the same room. However, this places way too much trust in the measuring girl. All kind of sparks have been known to fly when shlongs get whipped out with a guy and girl in a room together. This can lead to favoritism and inaccurate reporting of the measurements. There would need to be another, independent girl playing the role of penis measuring “auditor”. Call her the KPMG girl.

Assuming KPMG girl has to be paid also, the question of how much is this measurement worth comes up. We want to know what is the bet between the two original friends worth? If it is just an argument, as they state, they would have to put some of their own betting stakes on the contest to offset the costs of measuring girl and KPMG girl. That’s just basic economics. Once all that is settled, my friends, you have cleared the way for a proper penis measuring contest.

(Click through on image for full size view.)

A few months ago, the internet world was introduced to loving siblings Chris and Katie. Apparently, they had not been getting along so well after Katie told on Chris, so he decided to go through his sister’s stuff, only to find a “hook up list” detailing all the guys from school she wanted to get with or had already gotten with. He wasted no time in posting it to Facebook.

The list itself was quite amusing, and surprisingly well organized. It listed exactly what activities she wanted to do with each guy and the date she wanted it done by. Also, there were prerequisites for some of the guys. For example, Brian would be given a BJ if he cut his hair first. Funny stuff. It got even better in the comments, where Chris and Katie had a hilarious back and forth about the breach of privacy.

Well, this story is due for a “where are they now?” because one of the details included on the list was a deadline by which she wanted to complete the “action items” by. The date was April 2010. Did Katie accomplish her goals, or was she grounded? Did Chris get in more trouble? So many amusing questions remain unanswered. I wouldn’t honestly expect the story to resurface, but if it did it would be one of the greatest moments in the history of the internet. The obvious lesson is do not make a hook up list when you are in a fight with your brother, especially if he has Facebook!

For the millions of us out there trying to figure out how to not sleep with girls that want us, Drunk Irish Guy has laid out the process step by step for us. Actually, if you look at it from a different point of view, Drunk Irish Guy was just being a gentleman in his own way. Let us explain:

Step 1: Attract the girl with a sexy accent. The accent will also help to cover up the slurred speech that kicks in after the 14th shot of Jameson.

Step 2: Show affection by pointing out your “physical” reaction to her beauty.

Step 3: Get a smelly drunk friend to give her the old bump and grind and keep her company on an empty dance floor. You get extra points for calling her a lesbian for not liking it.

Step 4: Heroically rescue the girl’s coat by toppling coat racks and making clear the urgency of her need to leave for a nightcap.

Step 5: Express concern for her sick friend by worrying when she will finish puking. Give the two friends space and monitor them from around the corner.

Step 6: Spare her the game playing by taking a direct approach to express your desire for her.

Despite our being sarcastic here, it is a hilarious story regardless of whether or not our recap is a perspective you agree with. You might have gotten a laugh from Drunk Irish Guy and liked him, or you might have found him repulsive. Either way, you now know precisely how to not hook up with your New Year’s kiss.

1. 9 Sex Myths you Shouldn’t Believe.
2. Men who help clean get more sex.
3. Hustler publisher sues nephews for making “inferior porn”.
4. Behold: the condom pillow.
5. Creepy kids’ books that really exist.
6. Strippers. (Oh go on, it’s really funny. We promise.)
7. Touch my balls. Touch them.
8. Sexual bases throughout the decades.
9. Give this man a Nobel Prize.
10. The Porn Rangers. Watch out.

Nice to see that eHarmony is doing so great they can afford to reject applications displaying a sense of humor.