For many people, writing an online profile tops their most difficult task list. Considerably harder than bra shopping, cooking the perfect crème brulee or writing your own resume, writing an online profile has a reputation for being exhausting, emotionally draining and harmful to one’s self esteem. But if you’re writing a profile with the specific goal of seducing a potential suitor, the task can also be one of the most rewarding. Here are five ways to make the process easier and to write a seductive online profile successfully.

Open with a Bang

The opening line is undoubtedly the hardest line to write out of your entire online profile. After all, first impressions do matter, especially when you’re trying to seduce someone online (and you’ve got tons of competition). Let your opening line(s) reflect your personality and the specific goals you have from your online profile. Potential partners want to know about you, what you can do for them, and what they can do for you. They don’t want to know that you’re ‘looking for Mr. Right’ or interested in movies and long walks on the beach.

Be Vaguely Blunt

Yes, you read that right. One of the best ways to seduce someone (online or offline) is to let them know what you want without spelling it out. Being seductive is all about leaving something to the imagination and allowing the anticipation take over. If you’re not sure how to master this technique, have a friend proofread your online dating profile. He or she will be able to tell you if your point comes across clearly.

Use Pictures

Almost everyone know that profiles with photos attract about eight times more attention than those without. But you may be surprised to learn that if you’re hoping to create a seductive profile, you shouldn’t let it all hang out. While you may want to use a sexy photo, try to avoid poses or clothing that is just a bit too provocative. Leaving something to the imagination is what will make a potential partner click on your profile instead of passing over it.

When it comes to photos, another thing to consider is the number of images included in your profile. Experts estimate that 5-10 photos is more than sufficient. Having too many may distract the viewer from your end goal, or make him or her feel like they already know you (and don’t need to meet you). Choose pictures that are enticing without being overtly sexual, as photos that are too sexy may cause potential partners to think they’ll be out of your league, and can actually be a turnoff.

Choose the Right User Name

There’s a fine line between choosing a username like SexKitten and one like SchoolTeacher, neither of which will attract the type of person you really want to meet. Take time to think creatively about a good user name that will be charming and witty while saying a little something about yourself. If you need some inspiration, don’t hesitate to look on some of the top dating websites to get examples. Who knows – you may even find one you like that’s available on the website you’re using!

Be Honest

It sounds trite, but honesty is the best policy when it comes to online dating profiles, whether you’re looking for a one-night stand or a long-term relationship. You may be able to lure in more partners by announcing that you have a 24” waist or a voluptuous silhouette, but if you’re not being entirely honest, your partner will know, and will not be happy. The goal of writing a seductive online profile is to seduce the right type of person, not to attract the interest of every potential suitor on the website of your choice. Don’t be afraid to narrow down your options by writing the truth. This will surely be the way to hone in on the right options, rather than the wrong ones.

A very famous book came out in 2001, called The Art of Seduction, by Robert Greene. In it, he analyses history to discuss what he has isolated as the 24 most important seduction techniques. While some of them might seem a bit extreme, I think you’ll all agree they’re food for thought. Let us know if you find any useful!

1. Choose the Right Victim

Everything depends on the target of your seduction.  Study your prey thoroughly, and choose only those who will prove susceptible to your charms.  The right victims are those for whom you can fill a void, who see in you something exotic.  They are often isolated or unhappy, or can easily be made so—for the completely contented person is almost impossible to seduce.  The perfect victim has some quality that inspires strong emotions in you, making your seductive maneuvers seem more natural and dynamic.  The perfect victim allows for the perfect chase.

2. Create a False Sense of Security – Approach Indirectly

If you are too direct early on, you risk stirring up a resistance that will never be lowered.  At first there mist be nothing of the seducer in you manner.  The seduction should begin at an angle, indirectly, so that the target only gradually becomes aware of you.  Haunt the periphery of your target’s life—approach through a third party, or seem to cultivate a relatively neutral relationship, moving gradually from friend to lover.  Lull the target into feeling secure, then strike.

3. Send Mixed Signals

Once people are aware of your presence, and perhaps vaguely intrigued, you need to stir their interest before it settles on someone else.  Most of us are much too obvious—instead, be hard to figure out.  Send mixed signals: both tough and tender, both spiritual and earthly, both innocent and cunning.  A mix of qualities suggests depth, which fascinates even as it confuses.  And elusive, enigmatic aura will make people want to known more, drawing them into you circle.  Create such a power by hinting at something contradictory within you.

4. Appear to Be an Object of Desire – Create Triangles

Few are drawn to the person whom others avoid or neglect; people gather around those who have already attracted interest.  To draw your victims closer and make them hungry to possess you, you must create and aura of desirability—of being wanted and court by many.  It will become a point of vanity for them to be the preferred object of your attention, to win you away from a crowd of admirers.  Build a reputation that precedes you: If many have succumbed to your charms, there must be a reason.

5. Create a Need – Stir Anxiety and Discontent

A perfectly satisfied person cannot be seduced.  Tension and disharmony must be instilled in your targets’ minds.  Stir within them feelings of discontent, and unhappiness with their circumstances and with themselves.  The feelings of inadequacy that you create will give you space to insinuate yourself, to make them see you as the answer to their problems.  Pain and anxiety are the proper precursors to pleasure.  Learn to manufacture the need that you can fill.

6. Master the Art of Insinuation

Making your targets feel dissatisfied and in need of your attention is essential, but if you are too obvious, they will see through you and grow defensive.  There is no known defense, however, against insinuation—the art of planting ideas in people’s minds by dropping elusive hints that take root days later, even appearing to them as their own idea.  Create a sublanguage—bold statements followed by retraction and apology, ambiguous comments, banal talk combined with alluring glances—that enters the target’s unconscious to convey your real meaning.  Make everything suggestive.

7. Enter Their Spirit

Most people are locked in their own worlds, making them stubborn and hard to persuade.  The way to lure them out of their shell and set up your seduction is to enter their spirit.  Play by their rules, enjoy what they enjoy, adapt yourself to their moods.  In doing so you will stroke their deep-rooted narcissism and lower their defenses.  Indulge your targets’ every mood and whim, giving them nothing to react against or resist.

8. Create Temptation

Leave the target deep into your seduction by creating the proper temptation: a glimpse of the pleasures to come.  As the serpent tempted Eve with the promise of forbidden knowledge, you must awaken a desire in your targets that they cannot control. Find that weakness of theirs, that fantasy that has yet to be realized, and hint that your can lead them toward it.  The key is to keep it vague.  Stimulate a curiosity stronger than the doubts and anxieties that go with it, and they will follow you.

9. Keep Them In Suspense – What Comes Next?

The moment people feel they know what to expect from you, your spell on them is broken.  More: Your have ceded them power.  The only way to lead the seduced along and keep the upper hand is to create suspense, a calculated surprise.  Doing something they do not expect from you will give them a delightful sense of spontaneity—they will not be able to foresee what comes next.  You are always one step ahead and in control.  Give the victim a thrill with a sudden change of direction.

10. Use the Demonic Power of Words to Sow Confusion

It is hard to make people listen; they are consumed with their own thoughts and desires, and have little time for yours.  The trick to making them listen is to say what they want to hear, to fill their ears with whatever is pleasant to them.  This is the essence of seductive language.  Inflame people’s emotions with loaded phrases, flatter them, comfort their insecurities, envelop them in sweet words and promises, and not only will they listen to you, they will lose their will to resist you.

11. Pay Attention to Detail

Lofty words of love and grand gestures can be suspicious: Why are you trying so hard to please?   The details of a seduction—the subtle gestures, the offhand things you do—are often more charming and revealing.  You must learn to distract your victims with a myriad of pleasant little rituals—thoughtful gifts tailored just for them, clothes and adornments designed to please them, gestures that show the time and attention you are paying them.  Mesmerized by what they see, they will not notice what your are really up to.

12. Poeticize Your Presence

Important things happen when your targets are alone: The slightest feeling of relief that you are not their, and it is all over.  Familiarity and overexposure will cause the reaction.  Remain elusive, then.  Intrigue your targets by alternating an exciting presence with a cool distance, exuberate moments followed by calculated absences.  Associate yourself with poetic images and objects, so that when they think of you, they begin to see you through an idealized halo.  The more you figure in their minds, the more they will envelope you in seductive fantasies.

13. Disarm Through Strategic Weakness and Vulnerability

Too much maneuvering on your part may raise suspicion.  The best way to cover your tracks is to make the other person feel superior and stronger.  If you seem to be weak, vulnerable, enthralled by the other person, and unable to control yourself, you will make your actions look more natural, less calculated.  Physical weakness—tears, bashfulness, paleness—will help create the effect.  Play the victim, then transform your target’s sympathy into love.

14. Confuse Desire and Reality – The Perfect Illusion

To compensate for the difficulties in their lives, people spend a lot of their time daydreaming, imagining a future full of adventure, success, and romance.  If your can create the illusion that through you they can live out their dreams, you will have tem at your mercy.  Aim at secret wishes that have been thwarted or repressed, stirring up uncontrollable emotions, clouding their powers of reason.  Lead the seduced to a point of confusion in which they can no longer tell the difference between illusion and reality.

15. Isolate the Victim

An isolated person is weak.  By slowly isolating your victims, you make them more vulnerable to your influence.  Take them away from their normal milieu, friends, family, home.  Give them the sense of being marginalized, in limbo—they are leaving one world behind and entering another.  Once isolated like this, they have no outside support, and in their confusion they are easily led astray.  Lure the seduced into your lair, where nothing is familiar.

16. Prove Yourself

Most people want to be seduced.  If they resist your efforts, it is probably because you have not gone far enough to allay their doubts—about your motives, the depth of your feelings, and so on.  One well-timed action that shows how far you are willing to go to win them over will dispel their doubts.  Do not worry about looking foolish or making a mistake—any kind of deed that is self-sacrificing and for your target’s sake will so overwhelm tie emotions, they won’t notice anything else.

17. Effect a Regression

People who have experienced a certain kind of pleasure in the past will try to repeat or relive it.  The deepest-rooted and most pleasurable memories are usually those from earliest childhood, and are often unconsciously associated with a parental figure.  Bring your targets back to that point by placing yourself in the oedipal triangle and positioning them as the needy child.  Unaware of he cause of their emotional response, they will fall in love with you.

18. Stir Up the Transgressive and Taboo

There are always social limits on what one can do.  Some of these, the most elemental taboos, go back centuries; others are more superficial, simply defining polite and acceptable behavior.  Making your targets feel that you are leading them past either kind of limit is immensely seductive.  People yearn to explore their dark side. Once the desire to transgress draws your target to you, it will be hard for them to stop.  Take them farther than they imagined—the shared feeling of guild and complicity will create a powerful bond.

19. Use Spiritual Lures

Everyone has doubts and insecurities—about their body, their self-worth, their sexuality.  If your seduction appeals exclusively to the physical, you will stir up these doubts and make your targets self-conscious.  Instead, lure them out of their insecurities by making them focus on something sublime and spiritual: a religious experience, a lofty work of art, the occult.  Lost in a spiritual mist, the target will feel light and uninhibited.  Deepen the effect of your seduction by making its sexual culmination seem like the spiritual union of two souls.

20. Mix Pleasure and Pain

The greatest mistake in seduction is being too nice.  At first, perhaps, your kindness is charming, but it soon grows monotonous; you are trying too hard to please, and seem insecure.  Instead of overwhelming your targets with niceness, try inflicting some pain.  Make them feel guilty and insecure.  Instigate a breakup—now a rapprochement, a return to your earlier kindness, will turn them weak at the knees.  The lower the lows you create, the greater the highs.  To heighten the erotic charge, create the excitement of fear.

21. Give Them Space to Fall – The Pursuer Is Pursued

If your targets become too used to you as the aggressor, they will give less of their own energy, and the tension will slacken.  You need to wake them up, turn the tables.  Once they are under your spell, take a step back and they will start to come after your.  Hint that your are growing bored.  Seem interested in someone else.  Soon they will want to possess you physically, and restraint will go out the window.  Create the illusion tat the seducer is being seduced.

22. Use Physical Lures

Targets with active minds are dangerous: If they see through your manipulations, they may suddenly develop doubts.  Put their minds gently to rest, and waken their dormant senses, by combining a nondefensive attitude with a charged sexual presence.  While your cool, nonchalant air is lowering their inhibitions, your glances, voice, and bearing—oozing sex and desire—are getting under their skin and raising their temperature.  Never force the physical; instead infect your targets with heat, lure them into lust.  Morality, judgment, and concern for the future will melt away.

23. Master the Art of the Bold Move

A moment has arrived:  Your victim clearly desires you, but is not ready to admit it openly, let alone act on it.  This is the time to throw aside chivalry, kindness, and coquetry and to overwhelm with a bold move.  Don’t give the victim time to consider the consequences.  Showing hesitation or awkwardness means you are thinking of yourself, as opposed to being overwhelmed by the victim’s charms.  One person must on the offensive, and it is you.

24. Beware of the Aftereffects

Danger follows in the aftermath of a successful seduction.  After emotions have reached a pitch, they often swing in the opposite direction—towards lassitude, distrust, disappointment.  If you are to part, make the sacrifice swift and sudden.  If you are to stay in a relationship, beware a flagging of energy, a creeping familiarity that will spoil the fantasy.  A second seduction is required.  Never let the other person take you for granted—use absence, create pain and conflict, to keep the seduced on tenterhooks.

Rec sex: Short for “recreational sex,” this kind of fucking-for-the-fun-of-it usually comes from a positive, happy place; in other words, if you were depressed or heartbroken or enraged, the sex you had shouldn’t officially be called rec sex. But, really, any sex between two or more consenting adults outside of a long-term relationship could be referred to as rec sex. And rec sex doesn’t ensure that there won’t be any negative consequences (like heartbreak, jealousy, confusion, or STDs). But while you’re doing it, you’re not worried about the future: You’re in the moment. Rec sex is often employed as a more cheery synonym for casual sex, and is particularly common after one has sold a first novel, won the lottery, or received a refund on their tax return.

Booty call sex: Sex with a friend-with-benefits or a new lust interest that’s arranged via a phone call or text message made after 11 p.m.—usually because there are no better prospects and/or you’ve been drinking.

Appointment sex: A more formalized version of the booty call. This kind of sex scheduling is usually done more than twenty-four hours in advance, when both parties are sober. Email invitations tend to be favored over more casual text messaging messages or impromptu phone calls. This kind of arrangement happens more frequently among the older set—work-a-holics, recovering alcoholics, single parents, people for whom fart jokes have lost their charm, i.e., those who no longer have the patience (or the liver) to wait until closing time to make a booty call.

Ex sex: Sex with a previous partner, usually because they’re easy and you’re lazy. A.k.a. double dipping, blue- binning, recycling, returning to the well.

Cereal sex: A random one-night stand in the middle of a sexual/romantic dry spell: It’s delicious while it lasts, but it’s not filling, and an hour later you’re hungrier than you were before you “ate.”

Deja sex: Unexpected sex with someone you weren’t planning on seeing or sleeping with again. For instance, after a few keg stands, you spent one of your last college Saturday nights in a room at Theta Kai with what’s-his-name, never to see him again, until ten years later when you bump into him at the international trade convention in Dallas, and, after a few Maker’s Marks at the Hilton, end up in his room, for old time’s sake.

Drive-thru sex: Convenient sex, i.e., you stop by for a quickie and then keep on moving. (“I hate to boff and run, but I’ve got a plane to catch … ”).

Mercy sex: Sex with someone you are not particularly attracted to or don’t necessarily want to do. You do it simply because you feel sorry for them: Perhaps they’ve had a crush on you since sixth grade and swear they want “just one night of passion to help me move on,” their pet goldfish just died, you know they’ll be extra “giving” in the sack in return, you know this is your only hope of “deprogramming” them out of their cultish Trekkie community, their heart was just put through a blender (by you or someone else), they haven’t had sex in a long time and have no prospects, they’re dying of cancer, they’re thirty years old and still a virgin. A.k.a. charity work (most often used as a negative rebuttal, as in “I don’t do charity work.” Oh, snap!)

Comfort sex: The sexual equivalent of mac and cheese: sex after a bad day at work, a terrible break up, a tragic pet death—anything that makes you long for the consoling feel of warm skin on skin, of connecting with another soul. You usually have to find someone willing to have mercy sex with you, and when you do, it’s slow, deliberate, usually missionary, with face-holding and perhaps Rachmaninoff playing in the background. But while it may feel good in the moment, comfort sex, like comfort food, will usually make you feel worse after it’s all said and done.

Occasion sex: A one-night stand and casual sex due to a specific circumstance, such as a power outage, a heat wave, an announcement of war, a notification that the terror alert is raised to orange, a new Al Green album. Occasion sex may be celebratory (Obama wins the presidential election, you win the lottery, good hair day) or commiserative (Ah-nold wins the presidential election after a Constitutional amendment qualifies him, death of a pet, bad haircut).

Palate cleansing: Rebound sex that obliterates the bad taste left in your mouth (not literally) by a recent ex. A.k.a. sorbet sex.

Temp work: Casual sex you have until a better, more permanent relationship comes along. Thus, an overzealous matchmaking friend, an adult online personals site, an escort service, a brothel, or an “Overeaters Anonymous” conference could all be considered “temp agencies.”

Hate sex: When lust trumps like. Sex with someone who annoys you is a drag, but sex with someone you hate with every pore of your being? Now, that’s hot. Not on a regular basis, of course (that’s just depressing), but sometimes it’s just what the shrink ordered. And you just know there’s no relationship in it, because you’d kill each other first. Push each other around, pull each other’s hair, bite each other’s shoulders, and yell, “I hate you!” right as you climax. It’s like an enema for the soul.

Certain things are needed to push women over the brink of ecstasy. Try these sure-fire bedroom-tested strategies.

When I’m this close to orgasm—eyes squeezed shut, lips twisted in a Billy Idol sneer, cheeks glowing—the most descriptive word wouldn’t be “passionate” or “erotic.” It would be “determined.” Because right then, at the edges of my fading consciousness, I’m worried that the phone will ring, my knees will lose their traction on the sheets, or my boyfriend will change position, and suddenly I’ll be sliding away from that elusive peak instead of moving toward it. For the 75 percent of women who don’t always reach orgasm during intercourse, this happens all the time.

What we need is a fuse blower—that last shot of stimulation that blasts us into never-never land. “Calling it a fuse blower is pretty appropriate,” says sex therapist Ian Kerner, Ph.D. “Recent studies show that in order for a woman to achieve orgasm, the part of her brain associated with stress, emotion, and anxiety has to shut down.”

If you’re able to do something to a woman that feels so incredibly good that she completely relaxes and lets go, you’re highly likely to make that woman climax.
My friends helped me compile this list of orgasm triggers. Get her to the point where she’s sweaty and breathing fast, then try one.

THE DOUBLE GRIP

Despite all the attention her booty may attract when she’s walking down the street in tight jeans or bending over a file cabinet, a woman’s butt is too often sidelined during sex. And that’s why grabbing both of her cheeks when she’s on top may be just the unexpected turn-on a girl needs to get off.
“The buttocks are packed with nerve endings,” says Gilda Carle, Ph.D., a sex therapist in New York City. “To give her a surprising jolt of pleasure, spread your fingers wide and squeeze both buttocks firmly.”

But take it one step at a time. Yes, of course, there are women out there who crave a good spanking, but until you’ve had a conversation about this sort of thing—however playful you are—just keep it simple.

THE UP SHIFT

It was Rachel, my favorite sorority sister in college, who told me about this trick: “When a guy is on top of you in the missionary position, have him shift his body slightly forward so that, every time he thrusts, his penis rubs against your clitoris.” Yes, Rachel really talked like this, and yes, college was fun.
This tactic is even more orgasmic if the woman’s legs are together and the man’s are straddling her. “It increases clitoral stimulation,” says Ellen Friedrichs, M.A., an adjunct professor of human sexuality at Rutgers University. You can achieve the same effect when she’s on top by propping yourself up on your elbows, which places your abdomen in closer contact with her sweet spot.
 
THE ULTIMATE

There’s no question that clitoral contact is the ultimate fuse blower. But how—and how much—depends on the woman. “Going down on a woman allows you to get a real sense of the stimulation she likes at every stage of arousal, especially the final one,” says Kerner, who wrote a whole book on the subject: She Comes First. It also eliminates any performance anxiety she has during intercourse, so she can kick back and enjoy.

Learn what she likes. Get between her legs and give her a solid base of lips, tongue, gums, and even chin to rub against. At first, use your hands to guide her hips to let her know you want her to do the grinding. When she takes over, note how hard she’s pushing and in what direction. Use that information later when using your fingers or giving her a more aggressive tongue bath.

THE DROP TRICK

Steady clitoral contact is essential to female orgasm. But without adequate lubrication, it can become uncomfortable.

“Lubrication increases the comfort and speed with which you can penetrate the vagina and grind against the clitoris,” says Friedrichs. “But sometimes, no matter how turned on a woman might be psychologically, she can have trouble getting wet.”

Try a couple of drops of lube on the end of your tool. Then thrust with short, rhythmic strokes while pressing your body against her pubic mound. Don’t use too much lube or it’ll feel like throwing a hot dog down a hallway.

Consider Astroglide lube. Astroglide lubricants are formulated and tested according to the highest standards and come in a wide variety of styles, and flavors.

THE NECK WARMER

Our necks are highly responsive touch pads—the skin is thin, and the blood vessels are close to the surface. Psychologically, it can remind some women of “their first sexual experiences, which could make it even more exciting,” Friedrichs says. No hickeys, please: Don’t suck.

When you’re having sex and she’s clearly moving toward orgasm, brush your lips from her collarbone to her jaw, then give her neck big, warm kisses until she comes unhinged.

THE PLAY-BY-PLAY

For a verbal girl—and there are a lot of us out here—a string of four-letter words whispered in the heat of the moment can work wonders.

“Start by complimenting her or talking about how good what you’re doing feels,” advises Friedrichs. If she doesn’t say anything back, she might not be into it. If she responds with “Oh, yeah” or a similarly enthusiastic phrase, she wants more.

“Nothing makes me hotter than when he describes what he’s doing to me in explicit language,” says my friend Lana. “But I’m picky—there are certain terms that drive me wild, and others that make me cringe.”

Build a glossary: A goofy conversation over drinks about which anatomical nicknames are the sexiest isn’t a bad idea. And if she ever seems horrified by what comes out of your mouth, just say, “Sorry about that, I got carried away.”

Final note: Skip cheerleader comments like “C’mon baby, you can do it!”

THE DREAM MACHINE

“It’s a simple fact that some women can climax only by using a vibrator,” says Friedrichs. If your partner never hits her high note, no matter what you try, simply ask her if she’s ever had a battery-assisted orgasm. If she says no, introduce her to a whole new world of wow by ordering something small but powerful, such as a Vibrating Touch Massager.

If she’s over the age of 30, her answer will probably be yes, and she’ll be more than happy to pull her Magic Wand out of her bedside drawer. After asking what pressure and speed she prefers (many vibrators have several settings), all you have to do is hold the vibrator against her clitoris as you move from one position to another. Enjoy the magic show.

Have you ever looked at men who can get any girl they want and wondered, “how do they do it?” Yes, females are attracted to power and status. Yes, they are attracted to symmetrical features, strength and confidence. But we all know there are some unattractive, not-so-powerful guys who many women swoon over. Here are some of their secrets.

Steps

• Manage your image. Before you can seduce a girl, you must have a good, positive image. Make friends and be charming with every one you come in contact with. Never hesitate to tell one person what you admire about another, as it will eventually reach that person and appear undoubtedly genuine. Never argue (arguing is anti-seduction). No girl can resist a guy whom everyone likes, unless she’s the type to rebel against popular opinion just because it’s popular opinion (in which case the remainder of the steps will probably wear her down).




• Subtly reveal your sexual side. If you cannot insinuate, skip this step. When you talk about sex, say it in a way that Shakespeare would approve of. For example, “Sleep is my second favorite thing to do in bed” or “my neighbors are noisy during the day, but that’s okay because they put up with me at night.”




• Do the opposite of what other guys do. If the girl is drop-dead gorgeous, ignore her. After hearing about your rakish reputation, she will wonder why you are not attracted to her. If other guys ignore her, shower her with the attention she has been craving.




• Hint that other girls like you. Women hold each other’s opinions very highly and they get jealous easily.




• Speak seductively. Never start a conversation focused on work, school, MySpace, family, TV shows, or other everyday things. Never talk about yourself. Talk about exotic vacation spots, mythology, sex (sometimes), history, astrology, dreams, fate, and anything else pleasurable and intangible. Don’t express any opinions except for your preference for pleasurable things and for things that she likes. Keep a powerful gaze while talking about these things. The eyes are very important.




• Never apologize. And never worry when you talk with a girl. Iit will be written all over your face and interpreted as a sign of timidness, which, for most girls, is a turn-off.




• Show strategic weakness (optional). This step is optional, but it will speed up the seduction. If you naturally come off as weak, skip this step. For more masculine guys, a flash of weakness and sensitivity will make you seem honest, romantic, harmless, and more akin to a girl’s idea of “the one.” All girls are frightened of guys on some level. The more feminine and skittish the girl is, the more necessary this step is. The key to performing this step correctly is to bend the truth. Don’t talk about breakups or events that you really are sensitive about. As with dancing, it is your job to lead. Don’t lead her into a depressing discussion topic. Add a masculine angle to feminine subjects. A good idea would be to say, “yeah, I watched The Notebook. I liked how he didn’t give up hope after he saw her with the other guy.”




• Give her plenty of space. Neediness and smothering are unattractive qualities. There are bound to be things about you that she doesn’t like. Give her time to forget about those things and fantasize about the good things you have to offer.




• Make her laugh. When a woman laughs, she feels more relaxed and lowers her defenses (and inhibitions).




• Touch her. Reach for her hands, hair, shoulders, ankles, and back. Don’t just always wait for her to do it first. If she doesn’t like it, she’ll definitely let you know. But touching someone communicates to them that you find them attractive, and also that you’re reasonably confident. Both of these things can make someone feel more attracted to you.




• Make her feel irresistible. Try it by telling her something seductive, starting with rejection of this desirable thing – ex. “Please don’t wear short skirt tonight, as I will not resist the temptation!” or something like that “Don’t touch me like that. I like it more than I should.” She’ll probably keep doing it (consider it a form of reverse psychology).



And that should be enough to get you well underway. Go forth and conquer!

Great infographic from our friends at TheirToys. Revenge is sweet. Having your balls clawed: not so much.

Click through for the full awesomeness.

For years, the clitoris was considered the only trigger for the female orgasm. Alas, even finding the clitoris turned out to be a daunting task for many men, and things didn’t get any easier in 1950 when a physician by the name of Dr. Ernst Grafenberg found an even more mysterious female pleasure spot hidden within the vagina.

This area became popularized by sexologists in the 1980s as the “G-spot.” It turns out that stimulation of the G-spot produces a very powerful kind of female orgasm; and in some women, it even produces female ejaculation, colloquially known as “squirting.”

For both of these reasons, finding, stimulating and discovering how to master the woman’s G-spot has become, for both men and women, the Holy Grail of female pleasuring.

what exactly is the g-spot?

It is the bean-shaped, spongy tissue of the paraurethral gland, which is analogous to the male prostate. The actual area is only about the size of a quarter, but it feels rougher to the touch than the surrounding tissue. Because the G-spot is composed of erectile tissue, it swells up when blood rushes to it — especially if you learn how to master the woman’s G-spot effectively.

It is located about one to two inches back from the vaginal opening inside the front vaginal wall. The “front” wall is the wall of the vagina on the same side as her belly button.

the best way to find the g-spot

First of all, the G-spot is easiest to locate when a woman is sexually aroused, so don’t stint on your foreplay first. (You knew I would get that in!)

To locate and master the woman’s G-spot, face your partner while she is lying on her back and insert your index or long middle finger into her vagina as far as it will easily go. Then crook it up toward yourself in a “come hither” motion, sliding your fingertip along the top of the vagina until you find an area that is rougher than the rest of that vaginal wall. (Make sure you have your fingernails clipped short and buffed before you do this — sharp fingernails will definitely spoil the effort.) This rough or slightly ridged area is the “G-spot,” and touching it will often cause a woman to react with surprise or pleasure.

If you don’t get a reaction, don’t be too shy to ask her if she feels especially sensitive when you touch what you think is the spot. You may need to use a fair amount of pressure to find the G-spot because it is located within, not on the outside of, the vaginal wall.

Sometimes it helps to use your other hand on the outside of the mons pubis (the hairy area above the pubic bone) to lightly massage the skin in the area where your crooked finger is touching to intensify the effect. And since not all women are G-spot sensitive, don’t get discouraged if you can’t get a special reaction.

While some women are capable of multiple orgasms with repetitive stimulation of the G-spot, others don’t get much of a feeling and some even feel discomfort from G-spot stimulation.

No worries — every woman will appreciate the attention and the effort! And while searching, you might discover other areas in her vagina that she responds to even more enthusiastically.

tapping into love

The best way to manually stimulate the G-spot is with a firm “tapping” motion with your crooked finger. Some guys find it easier to stimulate the G-spot with various toys. Any dildo can be used for this, but the ones that are best suited for G-spot stimulation are hard and curved. Many are made specifically for G-spot stimulation, as their length, width and curve are specifically designed to take the “guesswork” out of G-spot stimulation.

Even women who do not enjoy manual stimulation of the G-spot may enjoy penile stimulation of the spot during intercourse. So, if your penis has a natural upward bend, you’ve got it made. Other men have to find positions that maximize penile contact with the front wall of the vagina. The “woman on top” positions and posterior (doggy style) positions are best for achieving that contact.

The only way to get G-spot stimulation in the missionary position is to prop her hips up with pillows (or with a special wedge known as “The Liberator”). Women can also intensify their ability to have G-spot orgasms by learning to contract their pelvic muscles, known as Kegel exercises.
sex gets better with age

There is some evidence that the intensity of a woman’s G-spot orgasm is mediated by the hormone estrogen. Most young women under 30 find clitoral orgasms to be more powerful because, due to their relatively high estrogen levels, their vaginal lining becomes too thick to allow direct stimulation of their G-spot nerves.

As the estrogen level begins to decline in women during their 30s, the vaginal lining becomes thinner and the G-spot becomes more accessible. That’s why most women feel that they begin to peak sexually in their early to mid-30s.

I’d tell you that it really works, but my black eye, squashed testicles, and missing front tooth suggest otherwise.

Nightclubs and bars are places conducive to picking up women who tickle your fancy. Part of the reason for that is that they’re places where women expect to be hit on, and so they’re not totally averse to the notion. Add to that the mood, lighting, and hazy glow associated with a little alcohol and you have a situation where you’ve got a better chance of picking up a woman than almost anywhere else. Plus (unless you know the woman is club-hopping) you’re likely to have most of the night available to win your target over. Here are 10 solid tips to help you on your way.

1. Display your interest

Before approaching your target, signal your interest by catching her eye or making an approving glance to gauge her reaction to you. Check out her reaction. Unless it’s overtly negative, keep letting her know from afar that you like what you’re looking at.

2. Lock in on your target

Scan the club and see if anyone catches your eye. If you see more than one woman who might make a good target, give precedence to one who is by herself, or at least with fewer companions. Observe her discreetly for awhile before making a move. You might pick up some information you can use later, either as a conversation starter or to avoid potentially awkward silences.

3. Territorial reconnaissance

Explore the club. Decide on the best location to plant yourself. Don’t put yourself too far away from the action. This could be at the bar, which will give you the opportunity to befriend the bartender, in the hope that he or she will give you priority service later on. Hopefully this will mean that while everybody else has to wait an inordinate amount of time, you can impress your target with the quick service you receive thanks to the groundwork you put in. Wherever you choose to be, make sure it is somewhere with good visibility that is centrally located; you don’t want to have to walk from one end of the place to another when you see someone you like.

4. Be direct

Women like to be credited with some intelligence. They know you’re hitting on them, so at least be upfront about it. Either ask her directly whether she’s alone and if she’d mind some company, or, if you have any flirt-game, ask her a question that requires a response. Even if she doesn’t respond the way you’re hoping, or doesn’t agree to your request, you can always use a little self-deprecating humor to save face. Say that you’ll just be on your way to the bathroom to cry for an hour because she’s crushed your burning romantic dream. She may appreciate your wit and ability to laugh at yourself, and change her mind.

5. Don’t waste time

If you wait too long to approach her you risk someone else getting there first. Don’t fear rejection. The worst thing that can happen is that she doesn’t respond to you. This happens to all men, the thing is not to let it stop you from continuing to try. It’s a numbers game. You’ll regret it more later if you didn’t try. And don’t assume by default that she’s going to be rude. Women are generally pleased that a guy has at least decided to be open about his attraction to them and has summoned up the courage to approach. Even if she isn’t interested, it’s most likely that she won’t be rude or cruel about it.

6. Ask if you can buy her a drink

Ask her what she’s drinking. If she’s almost finished, ask her if she’d like another one. Tell her you have some suggestions–you could tease her into trying something new, but don’t insist if she refuses. This is an opportunity to use innuendo to see how she reacts. For example, asking her if she likes “quickies”–hastening to add that you’re only talking about tequila shots. The idea here is to make her feel naughty and use tongue-in-cheek humor to set up a mood, without causing her to feel threatened or demeaned.

7. Enjoy the moment that you’re in

Assuming you get into the position of at least being in your target’s vicinity, focus on consolidating your position. Be attentive. Have fun. Make her laugh. Keep it light. Don’t try to dominate the conversation. Don’t lose yourself in the desire to think too far ahead–soak up the pleasure of the moment. Keep your eyes on her, yet don’t crowd her or get pushy/invasive. And for heavens’ sake don’t use the excuse that the nightclub is packed to act like a creep and rub yourself against her. Instead, let her feel reassured by your presence.

8. Get her dancing

If she’s enjoying a particular tune and things have proceeded well up to that point, ask her to join you on the dance floor. Avoid talking too much while dancing. Enjoy the music and let the rhythm take over. Ordinarily in a nightclub, the volume won’t lend itself to conversation, and such attempts will invariably become screaming matches. Don’t get too intimate with her on the dance floor unless she initiates it. Let her take the lead and put as much distance between the two of you as she needs to feel comfortable. Hum the lyrics if you like, but don’t sing out loud if you can’t carry a tune.

9. Keep your head clear

You definitely need your wits about you. Don’t drink too much, even if you think you can hold your liquor. The worst experience for a woman is for a guy to start slurring and coming on too strong without even being aware of it. It is a complete and total turn-off. Present yourself iniaitally as harmless and don’t try to impress her too much. If a woman gets comfortable with you, she’ll drop her guard and become more susceptible to what you have in mind.

10. Make your final move

After you’ve spent a good bit of time chatting with her, dancing, and enjoying each other’s company, go ahead and ask her either to have coffee with you sometime or whether you can see her again. Don’t indicate that you expect anything–she might think you’re exacting payment for the drink you bought her. Be happy and settle for whatever she’s ready to offer; it may be her number, another date, or, if you’re really lucky and you’ve made an impression, perhaps even the inside of her apartment.

Character index:

* “me” is Kim, girlfriend of Pete. (Only it turns out “me” isn’t really Kim.)
* “drakkertr” is the screen name for some guy, Pete’s friend, who’s hitting on Pete’s girlfriend (or, uh, thinks he’s hitting on Pete’s girlfriend.)

Here’s our interpretation of what’s going down:

1. drakkertr (D), Pete’s friend, plans a serious sexy hook-up with Pete’s girlfriend, Kim.
2. Unfortunately for D, Pete’s girlfriend here was really Pete. Pete is a jealous, conspiratorial dude. D is BUSTED.
3. D: “Huh? Wuh?” Shock ensues.
4. Seconds pass. D gamely attempts a recovery. “Yo, dude, I was joking, dude, ha ha.” Almost pulls it off for a second. But ultimate smell test: it’s bullshit.
5. Pete spits on D’s bullshit. Not a happy friend. Indicates he plans to communicate his unhappiness to D ir a probably violent and physical way.
6. D understands, pisses his pants.

More fun from craigslist. Wonder how that relationship is going now?

Necronomicox decided there was a gap in the market for, well, horror-themed dildos and got right on it. From their website:

Necronomicox was founded by a collection of artists with a love for the macabre. While the toy industry is full of a bewildering array of designs, there was nothing that fit with our twisted sensibilities. We saw a niche that needed to be filled, so to speak.

Toys designed for the dark side of your psyche. Sculpted and produced by hand with customizable colour schemes, each toy is made-to-order in body safe platinum cure silicone.

You can buy them here.

Found this great article over at allexperts.com. Enjoy!

Blowjobs are paradise for many men. But be aware that there are men that just don’t like them; there are men who either don’t get hard from BJs or can not cum from BJs – usually men who always like to be in control of their own orgasms.

If you come across a man who doesn’t come from blowjobs, there is one way to (probably) change that. It is rather extreme. You (in either a flat-on-your-back position or a kneeling position) will allow him to grab the back of your head, insert his cock in your wide-open mouth, and simply fuck your throat as if it were a pussy. Yes, you’ll gag and yes, you might throw up, but some girls do actually enjoy that, and I can guarantee you that many men LOVE that kind of whore-like throat-fucking BJ. If you let him use your throat like that he’ll either love you to death and worship your body afterwards, or he’ll start disrespecting you because you let him use your mouth as if you were a whore. Be careful that your man is the kind who loves a sexually deviant, liberated woman, not one who is scared of them, before you try the “fuck my throat” tactic.

For every girl who hates to be fucked in the throat till she gags, there are three that hate it. If you hate it, DON’T DO IT and don’t let him fuck your throat hard like that. Don’t let him have control of the BJ if he’s abusing your throat and not being gentle. Only let him do that if you like it.

For non-violent blowjobs which won’t hurt your throat, the advice is as follows:

Most important: make sure it is wet. Wet, slushy, sloppy blowjobs are the ONLY kind of blowjobs. Just like when he’s eating your pussy and driving you crazy with his mouth, it HAS TO BE WET to feel good. Use LOTS of spit, and LOTS more. Make it really wet with your mouth.

Next, the swirling, French-kissing technique is usually good. French kiss the head of his cock as if you’re in a porn movie… kiss it, suck on it, swirl your tongue around it, over it, under it, encircle it. Purse your lips and let it slip inside, and then swish your tongue all over the head.

Anyone who tells you guys don’t like their balls licked or shaft sucked is generalizing. Many, many guys like for you to vary it up, lick down their shaft, lick their balls, suck on their balls, lick the place between their balls and ass, and hey, if you’re up for it, lick their asshole. 75% of men ADORE having their asshole licked. Lick it good, like you’re licking clitty – it’ll drive him crazy ‘cause that’s where all his nerve endings are.

Do it for maybe ten or fifteen minutes. Then, when you want to make him cum, if you’re not willing to let him fuck your mouth, it’s best to still attempt to recreate the fucking motion, you know, open your mouth a little wider (so your teeth aren’t involved) and try bobbing your head up and down on it (or back and forth), letting it slide between your lips and into your mouth, then out again. Imagine you are a pussy, riding a cock, and you are trying to go faster and harder to get him and yourself off. That is the kind of rhythm you should be looking for. That will get him off.

Some other things most guys like in blowjobs:

Lots of lipstick never hurts. Some guys like no make up but just as many like slutty red or pink lips sucking their cock. Be his fantasy girl and use pink lipstick and suck it like you worship it.

LOTS OF EYE CONTACT. If you have his head in your mouth and you look in his eyes like you wanna rape him and fuck his brains out, the BJ will feel that much better.

LOTS OF SPIT – spit on it and pull your mouth away, holding it in your tightly-clenched fist… let the strings of spit and drool hang from his cock to your lips, then suck it and spit on it more – that’s what a lot of guys like, and that’s how the pornstars do it.

When he’s coming, it’s best to just keep doing what you’re doing. That’s my best advice for that. If you don’t want him to cum in your mouth, then jack it really hard, pump it with your fist, and aim the cock wherever you want the cum – tits, face, tummy, guys like cumming on those places – but usually nothing as much as in your mouth.

So I hope that advice helps with giving a blowjob. Some last 5 minutes and are a prerequisite for sex, some last half an hour ad are entities unto themselves.

One thing to remember – VERY IMPORTANT: you should not give it without expecting it in return. There is nothing as heavenly as having your pussy licked and your g-spot fingered to glorious, squirting orgasm. You should expect him to go down on you, preferably BEFORE you suck him off. It makes more sense – he makes you cum, then you make him hard and he fucks you. Or he makes you cum, and then you make him cum. Once the guy cums, he often loses a lot of sexual motivation.

If he’s not going down on you, make sure that he does. If he’s no good at it, ask me and I’ll tell you how to tell him how to make it really good. If he refuses to lick you and make you cum, well, you’re giving your BJs to the wrong guy and you can find someone that worships you and wants to give you pleasure as well as getting pleasure from you.

Some guys like to have their heads pushed down into the pussy area – you know, forcing him to service you. Maybe try that. Or push his face into your ass and make him worship you back there. It feels very, very good. Lots of men love licking sexy girls’ asses and pussies. Make him lick you wherever you want to be licked.

Whatever the case, just make sure he’s getting his – and you’re getting yours. You’re just starting out, so you have many years of blissful sex ahead of you. Don’t sell yourself short and don’t worry about any of it – that’s just life!

Hey CasualEncounters,

I just arrived in New York, and I’m about to meet up with a few friends here to start chasing some pussy. I’m staying here at the W in Times Square — right in the heart of all the action. I don’t think I could live here without going crazy — CA will always be home. But occasional visits to the City are awesome — albeit quite expensive. So I’m here for a few days, and my goal is at least two chicks. Chicks in NYC can be tough and aloof, but I’m confident that my skills are up to the challenge. Next stops are DC and Miami — this East Coast leg of my newfound life of leisure and pussy shall be quite enjoyable. On the Rebecca front — we’ve chatted briefly recently, but I didn’t tell her I was gonna be right in her backyard. I just said I had to do some travelling for business — and left it at that. If I can avoid Atlanta during my entire trip out here, then I can declare myself to be officially over her.

I had a long conversation the other night with a girl who I’ve been friends with forever (and a rare one I’ve never tried fucking). She is more like a sister — a really great girl. She was asking me why I don’t meet someone, settle down, blah blah blah. How to you convey and describe the desire to chase pussy to a girl? I didn’t try, but I think the best analogy is to shoes. No matter how much a chick likes a pair of shoes, she will be wanting to check out a new pair with days — if not hours. It is just an insatiable drive — they can have 1000 pairs, and they’ll still want another. That is how I (and I’m sure most guys reading this) feel about pussy. Males were not built nor designed for monogamy. That’s just a fact. Well enough pontificating and rationalizing my casual encounters — I’m ready to head out for the night. Hopefully I’ll have some salacious NYC details to share soon.

Justin