1. Could swinging be made illegal in the US? The surprising conclusion.
2. Burning man? Don’t forget your latex gloves…
3. Women achieving orgasm through thought alone (not saying it isn’t possible, but I’d like to see it…)
4. Heh. Whoops?
5. Experience the wonder of a penis on your chin.
6. Bring out your dead: The 10 flavors of necrophilia…
7. Best cure for hiccups EVAR.
8. A powerful argument for reading labels on glue products…
9. The snuggie sutra.
10. German police have too much time on their hands.

Besides being a serial web entrepreneur, Ross Williams is founder and CEO of WhiteLabelDating.com, the most successful private online dating business in the United Kingdom. I follow and comment on White Label Dating’s blog, and first heard of him through it. I thought it’d be great for our readers (not to mention kind of a coup!) if I could get him to do an interview for us. It took a little wrangling and back-and-forth, but I managed to pin him down to answer a few questions in the end.

Read on for an insight into the mind of a sharp guy and one hell of a businessman who is really living the dot-com mogul dream…

Hi Ross, thanks for taking the time to respond to my questions, I really do appreciate it. When I was doing research for this interview I found a lot of information about your business activities, but not much about you as a person. What can you tell us about your life outside of the White Label Dating universe?

Well, there’s an online bio to be found at http://www.rosswilliams.com which goes through my background before starting WhiteLabelDating.com. I was awarded an organ scholarship at my school, then was lucky enough to be chosen by the Royal Air Force for a Flying Scholarship, where the RAF paid for me to learn how to fly.

At University I studied Psychology and French before setting up my own website design company and then WhiteLabelDating.com.

Outside of work I really enjoy travelling – which is great as we’re expanding into the USA, Canada, South Africa, New Zealand and Australia so I get to travel a lot with work at the moment to meet our partners in these territories.

I’m also a big car fan – I’ve been lucky enough to have a few TVRs (British hand-made sports cars) and Aston Martins. Now I’ve got a lovely Aston Martin DBS and a new Morgan Aeromax being delivered next year.

I saw in an interview you gave in mid-2007 that your objective for 2008 was to make WhiteLabelDating.com the #1 white label dating provider online. Have you achieved that goal yet? If not, why not? If so, how did you do it?

Absolutely, without a shadow of doubt. There were two main competitors in the white label dating space, but we’ve never lost a partner to either of them whilst they’ve both lost most of their partners to us.

I think we’ve become the best white label platform by focussing on our people rather than our technology. Other companies have tried creating a very highly engineered platform which was simply over-engineered for the task required.

We’ve got a good, strong, very high-converting platform coupled with excellent account management – I’ve got a team of a dozen account managers who look after our partners, with a very very low number of large partners for each account manager. This means my partners can dedicate a lot of time to their partners – in some cases, up to one day out of five will be dedicated to a single partner.

This means that our partners earn more money with us than anyone else – which is why we’re the number one.

What thing or things do you enjoy most about your position as WLD’s CEO and why? What attracts you to the dating industry in general?

Well, I have a fantastic team around me – I employ 65 staff full time in our UK Headquarters – and we have a great environment, working together, earning good money and helping people find fun and love online.

The dating industry is fantastic – it’s still got enormous potential to grow and I’ve no doubt that it will become the main way that people will find love. It’s a growing, profitable business to be in – and it’s great receiving testimonials from members who have found love through one of our partners sites.

It’s also good to know that we’ve allowed hundreds of partners to give up their full-time job and enjoy a better quality of life, working where and how they want to work to run their dating site and earn more money than they could ever earn in full time employment.

We’re paying some partners in excess of $350,000 per month now in revenues – that’s great for them and I really enjoy seeing them grow and knowing we’ve helped make a difference in their lives.

What do you think is the most important advice that someone considering starting a white label dating site should receive?

VISIT THE PLATFORM PROVIDER – most of our new partners originally start their site on another platform which promised them a massive revenue share or all the marketing support they’d ever need – the problem was, their site didn’t convert and didn’t make money, so they earned a high share of very little money.

Some disreputable companies will promise the world, but it’s you who needs to pay for the marketing and take the risk, so make sure you meet with the people in person, meet with their customer support team, development team (who will provide your users with new features) and ideally meet with some of their current partners as well.

Whatever you’re promised, remember that if done right, starting a white label dating site will be the best thing you do and could give you the freedom to live your life how you want and earn what you want. So don’t get stung by unscrupulous companies who don’t have the resource to back you up.

What do you think really separates WLD from its many competitors? What’s your unique selling proposition?

Our people – anyone who saw us in Miami or has come to one of our partner events will know that we’ve got a great team who are genuinely passionate about dating and helping our partners.

We’ve got 65 staff at present, still growing by about 5-10% per month – one of our competitors has one member of staff in the UK and a few unpaid developers in the Ukraine. The other competitor only has a few people in the UK and most of their people are also in the Ukraine – that particular competitor competes with it’s partners as well by promoting their own-brand sites to members.

Any plans for WLD you’d like to share with us? Any shout outs or additional comments?

There’s certainly some plans I’d love to share here, but all in good time – we blog regularly on our site at www.whitelabeldating.com and will be announcing some very exciting news for our partners in September 2009 – quite simply, you ain’t seen nothin’ yet!!

Sex in the Movies vs Sex in Real Life vs Sex Between Two Women: a side-by-side analysis. Whoever drew this is obviously some kind of sex expert.

1. Barry White songs used to encourage shark to mate in aquarium.
2. Taking Seinfeld jokes to the real world: not a good idea.
3. After 45 years on the gig, stripper still packing them in.
4. Creepy, creepy pillows.
5. Outed model-slagging blogger feels betrayed by Google, will take it to the Supreme Court.
6. 10 things not to say to Hooters girls.
7. This is why friends don’t let friends do PCP.
8. Have a creepy old woman.
9. Up to 11,000 U.S. veterans may have been mistakenly infected with HIV. Whoops?
10. Scientologists are wackjobs. Here’s one.

You may have read about this triumph of technology over here.

Sellers in Germany bill the dissolving “Get Naked” costume as a chance for men to get their own back after a break-up. Women’s rights campaigners take a different view… here’s a link to the original video showing the bikini being tested (as it seems to keep disappearing from everywhere else…)

God bless Belgium and their selfless pursuit of scientific knowledge. Enjoy!

Fairly self-explanatory…

1. Research confirms men not as picky about sex partners as women (no shit.)
2. Do single women seek out attached men?
3. The Count: censored.
4. Less sex, more TV for India.
5. Sexist computer is sexist.
6. Tell me this isn’t what it looks like.
7. Kelly Clarkson sort-of fail.
8. Gruesome rock’n'roll legends investigated.
9. Tough times in the porn industry–Savannah Stern driving a used car!
10. Prostitution: a users’ manual.

Found this craigslist post a little while ago. Freaking HYSTERICAL. Enjoy.

Dear Men of Craigslist,

Look, I know you men have it difficult. Women are just about impossible to understand, much less please. In a post-feminist society, you never know exactly what you should be doing. Women are bloody picky, I know we are. It can be scary, too, when women freak out about what appear to be benign issues. And men who do their best to be respectful, female-positive humans, I salute you, I do.

But please, please just fuck me already. Honestly, I appreciate your thoughtfulness. I like that you want to take things slow. I can totally get behind the idea of emotional connection, but dearjesusinheaven, FUCK ME. We’ve done dinner and drinks. We’ve gone dancing. We’ve cuddled and watched a movie. I’m wearing a low cut shirt and you’ve been staring at my breasts all night. Goodgodalmighty, get to it and fuck me.

When we get hot and heavy, please take charge. Please, please fuck me. Trust me, I’m not going to just lie still – I’ll get involved. But don’t make me force your hand into my panties. That makes me feel like a rapist. We’ve been kissing for a half hour and your hand keeps grazing my ass. That’s nice, but it’s time to move forward. Get on top of me. Don’t make me get on top right out of the gate and start bobbing up and down on your cock like I’m practicing some crazy new aerobic yoga because YOU won’t go down on me. Roll on top and start dry humping like a good boy should. Don’t gently suck my nipples and then pull back when I moan with pleasure. You being coy is totally not what I want. It’s not what WE want.

OK, I know it’s scary. There are lots of women out there who make fucking really difficult. So, I have compiled some handy tips. Don’t think of this as complaining, or as schadenfreude for the Andrea Dworkins of the world. Just some simple tips, for timid men who have forgotten what it means to fuck like men:

1. Taking charge is not bad. Oh, there will be some women who feel that you are pushy. If you are making out with a woman, and she starts to push back, ask nicely if things are moving too fast. If she says yes, say something like “I’m sorry – you just look so fucking delicious. I’ll go slower.” Otherwise, skillfully move forward. If you start kissing a woman, and she responds well, and before long, you’re both on the floor with her skirt pushed up, and you on top of her, it’s not the time to roll onto your back and start awkwardly stroking the top of her head. Seriously, grow a goddamn pair. YOU’RE the man. Act like one.

2. Ohmyfuckinggod, please learn to respect the clit. It’s different for every woman, so ask what she likes. Do not, I repeat, do not just wiggle your fingers around her pussy like you’re trying to tickle her. Do not drum your fingertips against her vulva like you are impatiently waiting at the Sears Tire Center for your receipt. Do not push the clit like it is a doorbell at some house that you need to get inside of. Start by using all four fingers with firm yet gentle pressure against the outside of her pussy. Do not charge in with a single finger and start jabbing at things. And if you really don’t know what to do, ask her. Just ask. “How do you like it?”. It’s a simple question, and most women will answer straight out. If she’s being all coy, ask “Do you like pressure? Is it sensitive?” The clitoris is a varied item, indeed. Treat each one as though you have never encountered one before. Forget everything that your last partner liked.

3. Most women like to be fucked, and fucked well. Yes, there are women out there who want to “make love” every time – sweet, gentle, rocking love with lots of eye contact and loving kisses. Those women are not the majority. The majority like to be pounded. The majority like to have their hair pulled. The majority like a good, solid jackhammering. When a woman is bucking wildly against you, it’s not because she wants you to pull back and slowly swirl your cock around her vagina like you’re mixing a cake batter up there. It’s because she wants you to hold down her arms, or grab her hips, or push her legs above her head, and fuck her harder. Don’t be too afraid of what this means as far as gender equality goes – I am a raging feminist bitch, but I still want to be penetrated like you are planning on fucking my throat from the inside out.

4. A little roughness is nice. Do not pretend that you had no idea that some women like their hair pulled. Do not act shocked if she wants you to spank her (“Really? Spanking? Won’t it hurt?” – yes, it does. That’s the fucking point). We know you’ve read Stuff and Maxim, and that’s all those laddie mags talk about in their “How to Please Her” sections. Start with light, full handed smacks to the area of her ass that she sits on. Judge her response and continue on from there. You don’t have to bend her over one knee and tell her she’s a naughty girl and that Daddy’s going to punish her; save that for the fifth date. Women are less delicate than you think, so don’t worry about breaking her hip.

5. It’s OK for you to make noise. Otherwise, we feel like we are fucking a ninja. Unless you actually are a ninja, and have sneaked into our rooms with vibrating nanuchaku and zippered black pajamas, please, please make some noise. If you’re banging a woman, and she’s crying out and saying your name and moaning, and you can’t even manage a grunt, she’s going to feel like an idiot. You don’t have to make the sounds she is making, but do SOMETHING. You know how when you are watching porn, and the girl does something great to the guy and the guy kind of goes “Ah!”, half grunt, half yell? That’s HOT. Do that. Whisper our name (assuming you know it) gruffly. Groan against her neck when you’re in missionary position. You don’t have to grunt like a mountain gorilla, but if you are totally mute, she’s going to get worried.

6. Most women like dirty talk, in addition to the grunting. If you’d like to get some dirty talk going, ask her if she likes the way you fuck her. If she responds well, continue with something like, “I love fucking you. God, you look so fucking hot.” Is she still moaning in response? “Your tits are so beautiful.” Does that work? If she doesn’t respond well to the term “tits”, you might have to stop there. If she keep moaning or responding, pass Go and collect $200. Try the following:

“Oh, god. Your pussy is SO tight.”
“You’re so wet – are you wet because you like the feel of my cock ramming you?”
“I think I’m going to come inside you. I’m going to fill up your little cunt.” It doesn’t matter that you’re wearing a condom; we LOVE hearing this.

If all of those work, you can then progress to things like “sexy little bitch” and “dirty whore”. Tread carefully, but please, tread. Do not tiptoe. Do not sit down. Charge.

7. You’re not obligated to eat a woman out. In return, she’s not obligated to choke on your dick. Don’t skip one and expect the other. If you do eat a woman out, the only comment you should make about her pussy is how nice it is. The length of her labia minora, the color of her interior, her waxing job or full bush – you are not John Madden. No time for color commentary.

8. Do not bitch about condoms. Oh, we hate them. Trust us. They hurt us more than they hurt you. But we don’t want to be preggers, and you don’t want to catch anything, right? Don’t whine about condom sex. Do not explain that you can’t come with one on. LEARN to come with one on, or if not, help us figure out what to do with you once we’re satisfied and it’s time for you to let loose your load.

9. We really like it when you come. It’s called a money shot for a reason. Watching semen shoot out of you is one of the most gratifying things EVER. However, do not assume that she wants you to jack it off onto her face. She might, but don’t assume. Seeing and/or feeling you come is rewarding for us, so there’s no need to deprive us of it, but please do consult us before unleashing. “I think I’m going to come – how do you like it?” is a fair question that shouldn’t rob you of your testicles.

In recent memory, I’ve been fucked by a very aggressive, manly guy, and I’ve been… well, fucked is the wrong term here. I’ve been penetrated by a total and utter wuss. Who am I going to run back to when I’m ready for my fill? Manly McHardon, that’s who.

—————————————————-

*New point of clarification – some people have brought up some really great issues in response to this post, so let me say this: I don’t mean to imply that all women like to be treated like whores. I do mean to say that most women I know have told me that they like sex rougher than most men give it to them. Rough does NOT equal chains and bondage. And this applies to the bedroom only, and does not mean that she wants you to choose her dinner for her, or treat her like less of a person.

**Some women have said that they don’t like it rough and what the hell am I thinking? Well, girls, you’re in the minority. HOWEVER, all women need to remember that, in addition to be straight forward about your sexual desires, you need to be straight forward about your sexual limits. Don’t be afraid to ask for more, but when something feels wrong, say so. Don’t ever do something you don’t want to do in silence and then blame the guy. Silence is dangerous.

Quick Summary:

Hookup potential: 1/5 Features: 3/5 Design: 4/5 Content: 3/5

• Decent quantity of porn available to members, games, AV chat, free scheduled cam shows
• Nice custom design, well-integrated with content offerings
• “Sex dating” aspect pretty much a scam. Excessive shilling and fakery, even by industry standards

The Full Story:

I don’t know about you, but to me, “casual” dating sites should be about more than looking at tits and ass. They should be about hanging out in an environment where there’s the chance of finding some quality NSA action. What really annoys me about this site is the sheer level of fakery. With most of the “adult dating” sites there’s a level of fakery and shilling for upsells, but hookup.com really goes above and beyond.

Look, all you guys. If I want porn, I’ll go to a porn site. If I want a camwhore, I’ll go to a camwhore site. The reason I’m here on your SEX DATING site is that’s I’d like to do some SEXY DATING. Capeesh?

The site is very heavily focused on convincing you that you need to join a webcam membership site or a porn site. The female profiles are mostly fake, as are the flood of messages you receive from them. It’s particularly noticeable that most of the messages seem to have been written by the same person, as the the same spelling and grammar mistakes keep being repeated.

One positive thing I will say about the ubiquitous webcam upsells, is that at least if you actually join this site you get regularly scheduled FREE (public) camshows. Although they’re not private, they are explicit, and it beats paying $4 a minute at a regular cam site for them. Watch and participate in a couple and you’ve pretty much made the price of your membership back. Members also have access to a large number of “member galleries” (read: picporn), porn videos, video/audio/text chatrooms, and adult games.

As for the site design on HookUp.com, it’s decent. Clean, attractive, straightforward. None of the content offerings look “bolted-on” as they do with a lot of other sites.

However, overall I can’t recommend HookUp.com for hookups. A decent porn site, but you’ll be lucky beyond belief (as a straight male) to find anyone real here worth banging if you join.

1. Interviews with real male escorts.
2. Sex for Lucifer.
3. A sex guide for ultrareligious douchebags.
4. Women prefer beer-guzzling, overweight “real” men. (Dubious.)
5. Cat cleared of illegal porn charges.
6. Cuba runs out of toilet paper.
7. Obese prison inmate conceals gun in folds of flab.
8. Heroic Greek woman sets fire to Briton’s genitals.
9. Old school strip cartoonists draw on the bathing suits of comely young models.
10. 25 things to do on the Internet before you die.

Lance is the penis-wielding component of Honey and Lance (for our interview with Honey and Lance’s female half, check this interview out).

A self-professed “aspiring kickass dude”, Lance’s sharp takes on the dating and mating game tend to be PUA-culture informed, but more thoughtful and emotionally honest than that fact might lead one to suspect. We were delighted when he agreed to give us this interview.

Not to reopen old wounds, Lance, but I’m a nosy old gossip, and when I was reading Honey’s response to my question about how your blog started I saw she stated that you were a “jackass” after you guys broke up, but that she forgave you. Do you think that’s fair comment, and if so, how were you a jackass?

Jackass is absolutely a fair statement. In fact, I still refer to myself as a jackass on a weekly basis because it keeps me humble and keeps me working on things. The short of it is Honey and I had a great relationship that I let disintegrate because I didn’t know how to handle a long-distance thing and I wasn’t man enough to face it. There were a lot of things I wasn’t man enough to do back in those days, and fortunately I’ve done a lot of growing since then and fixed a lot of my issues. I’m very lucky that Honey and I have a good relationship now that includes a rewarding creative partnership.

You refer to yourself as “an aspiring social artist”—what does that mean to you? How does wanting to be a “social artist” inform your everyday life and decision-making?

I don’t at all identify myself as a pickup artist. Measured purely on standards of pickup, I’m fair at best, well below average compared to the best guys. I label myself a social artist because I try to leverage all of the social skills I’ve developed into every facet of my life, from business networking to meeting women to improving my relationships with my regular friends to creating alliances at my job. I find this approach to life far more powerful and rewarding than simply using routines to game chicks and I think the best PUA’s and naturals understand this. Right now I’m very focused on my entrepreneurial pursuits so I use my skills to network, form connections, and close deals.

How would you sum up your advice with regard to dating, socializing, and intimate relationships? What’s your relationship to the “seduction” community?

That’s a tough question because all three are distinct. Being well rounded and an experienced dater is extremely helpful in dating. For socializing, interacting with many groups and individuals and exchanging value is good. I’m still trying to figure out intimate relationships! If pinned down, my thinking is that a successful LTR takes into account how the two partners make each other feel and everything else is gravy. If she makes me feel like a man and good about myself, she’s a keeper, and if I inspire her and make her feel like a woman, than she wins, too. All the logistics and commonalities will follow after that. That’s really hard to do, of course, because usually the individuals are selfish to the point where they don’t consider the partner or are not skilled enough to inspire the other person.

My relationship to the community is pretty loose, I author a blog that occasionally touches on pickup, game, and attraction. Beyond that, I’m friends with some guys who are pickup artists.

Looking at the things you enjoy on your “about” page, I see you include reading—what sort of stuff do you like to read? What attracts you to it?

I read anything and everything. It can range from Alan Greenspan’s “Age of Turbulence” to Tony Robbins to Guy Kawasaki to a Twilight novel. I devour the written word and much of it is mood dependent.

What are your current life goals, and how are you working towards them?

Lots of goals, but I’d like to own an Internet based business that’s worth somewhere in the $30 million range. Short term, I want to turn H&L into a moneymaker and then launch a couple of other sites. I’m always working on my fitness and maybe way down the road I’d like to publish a book or three.

Anything else you’d like to add or share with our readers? Projects you’d like to plug? Thoughts, comments?

I’d love to see some leader in the dating or pickup niches tackle deep relationship game, like break down what to do after the 2-3 month mark. It’s pretty clear to me that relationships are far more complicated than attraction and first dates and I’m fairly certain there are common structures that can be quantified just like in pickup.

Quick Summary:

Hookup potential: 4/5 Features: 3/5 Design: 1/5 Content: 4/5

• Members seem to be pretty interesting and really take the time to update their profiles.
• Every page of this site is riddled with Google Ads.
• The links don’t flow logically. It is easy to get lost in the site, or to be tricked into clicking on a deceptive link.

The Full Story

Ok, first things first: the women on this site come off as interesting – and therefore, hot. Some even look it! Most of the profiles I’ve seen are well-written and direct. A new member will quickly get a feel for who among his or her prospects would be a good match.

The filters set upon the site actually work. I once tried to message a woman whom I thought was interesting but the website won’t let me–the woman had specified that she may only be contacted by people who live within her area and didn’t smoke. Oh well.

When you do find someone you can get in touch with, you can send online gifts along with your message. There’s no chat here (I read that it was removed recently) so it’s all about the emailing/messaging.

The very major downside of the website is this: it is atrociously designed and riddled with Google Ads. This is not nitpicking. I’ve seen my share of awfully-designed websites but this is one of the worst-looking I’ve ever seen.

First on the craplist is the Google Adwords advertising. Everyone who’s done his or her share of online searches would have encountered “information-lite” websites with two Google ad banners, and a text strip of ads slapped within the text content. (Google only allows three of its ad scripts to run within the same page.)  You will find these here: two huge, chunky Google image ads and a strip of text ads within many  pages’ content. The real problem is that some of the ads have been deliberately manipulated to look like they’re part of the site’s internal content. It’s clearly a deceptive practice to gain more clicks. Sure, it’s a free site and Markus (the site’s owner) has to make money, but it’s hugely distracting and irritating.

Secondly, the site’s basic organization just sucks. It’s like the webmaster decided to play a cruel joke and just slap random links anywhere he or she pleased. There is no cohesiveness or method to the design and structure – no flow.

Ideally on a website, the navigation links are “chunked” logically. For example, when you’re in a particular subsection of the website, you’d expect to see links related to sections within that subsection. This is not the case here. It’s a retarded, confusing mess. Add this to the Google ads “hidden” within legitimate site content, and you’re bound to get frustrated after a while.

And really, both of these things – the ads, the maze of links – would be tolerable if the site at least looked good. But not even.

Visually the site reminds me of when the plaintext-dominated websites were the thing. You know what I mean: all text content, with chunks of paragraphs and no images, perhaps “jazzed up” with a non-white  background color. Webmasters would just diddle with their font sizes or colors to create visual interest. That’s how a lot of the pages look. You end up thanking the members for having pictures in their profiles; otherwise, the visual experience would send you to sleep.

When you date, you want to attract people, right? So best foot forward. It should be the same with websites, especially dating websites. Dating sites should try their best to engage their members visually. The site should at least be easy on the eyes – it should be attractive and make you want to stay longer.

This does not happen here. If it weren’t for the interesting members and their very engaging profiles, I’d have deleted my account and taken my business elsewhere pretty quickly. What can I say? Looks do matter.

I’d still recommend PlentyOfFish on balance because of the size of the membership database and the quality of the profiles. The messaging and filters work well enough so there is a decent possibility of getting together with someone who meets your criteria. But my recommendation comes with the caveat to look at the site by squinting through your face-covering fingers.

1. Kevin Smith on strippers.
2. Prostate massagers. I’m frightened.
3. The world’s strongest vagina.
4. Newsweek does polyamory.
5. Why do women prefer tall men?
6. Red wine makes women frisky. GET OUT.
7. Teaching sex to the mentally handicapped.
8. Brush your teeth, brush your vagina.
9. Saknussemm’s ten favorite fetishes.
10. Polish mom claims pool got her daughter pregnant, suing.