I’m dedicating a whole section to this, because how you treat her after sex is just as important as during sex. You may think that if you’ve given her a great orgasm your work is done. You may roll over and slip into blissful, trouble-free dreams. Wait! Just as your physiological makeup differs from hers and makes your needs during sex slightly different, so it is after sex. Your body feels limp, and sleepy. All you want to do now is roll over. You’ve had sex, you wanted it like crazy and now it’s over you’re ready to think about something else.
It may not surprise you to hear that women are usually the opposite. They’re not sleepy, though their bodies feel very warm and relaxed, and their mind is still contemplating the sex. Their bodies are saying: “That felt really nice. I just had sex with someone and it was great, now I just need a bit of reassurance that he still cares about me and wasn’t just using my body.”
So if you roll over at this point and start snoring, her body says, “What?! He was just using me, he won’t even hold me for a minute!” She feels vulnerable and lonely. All you need to do to avoid this is hold her for 5-10 minutes, stroke her body a little bit (her neck, back, arms and face) and murmur a few reassuring things in her ear. It will mean a lot to her, and she’ll probably decide to sleep with you again, so make this a habit after sex.
After sleeping with the same partner for a while, you may be looking for new things to introduce to liven things up a bit, or just to share with her to deepen your relationship. In the next section, we will look at a few ideas for making great sex even better.